What does "Time of your life" really mean?

We all have various strengths and weakness. One of my weaknesses is a longstanding apparent inability to truly relax. I mean, I can, but ironically enough it takes a lot of work for me to truly take a step back and “smell the roses”.


While my Facebook feed may look like my life has become one of no work and all play, typically it is the exact opposite of such an absurd notion. Although I have learned to enjoy sightseeing and encountering various cultural experiences, my mind most always seems to be running non stop as I think about everything I’ve got to do next, or of the things I need to keep working on, or about my family and friends back at home who are usually only beginning their day as I’m wrapping up mine.

The reality of the matter is that, just like most things, it’s all kind of bittersweet. Now, please don’t hear what I’m not saying. I am most grateful for the adventures I’ve been fortunate enough to take part in or create for myself over the past eight months as, over these past eight months, I’ve stepped foot in eleven countries (including the United States). Along with becoming an unsuspecting globe trotter, I achieved a personal as well as a professional milestone through interning for half of a year with a United Nations Agency (UNESCO), and now I’m blessed to study in Poland as a Boren Scholar. It all sounds pretty sweet, right?

Yes. Well, kind of.  

I have lost count of the number of times I’ve heard friends, family, and even strangers remark that I “must be having the time of my life”. While I’m certainly enjoying memorable moments in life, I think of “the time of my life” as a sort of pinnacle, which I undoubtedly hope this is not.

You see, although it’s wonderful to experience life rather than to simply live life, I hope and pray that, looking back, the pinnacle of my life has something to do with my family or opportunities I hope to have in which I can truly make a difference in our world, positively impacting the lives of those around me.


Moreover, on a practical note, although I am thoroughly enjoying this season of life, it has also been one that has come with a number of unforeseen challenges. Small matters include those such as having items stolen in the mail, trying to stay in touch with others back home in the midst of a perpetual six hour time difference, or finding myself alone in foreign lands where I’ve got no one by my side and can’t adequately speak the language. The larger challenges come with the territory, regardless of whether I was working in France or am in my language classes in Poland.

 On a more personal note, some of the most substantial challenges I have faced pertain to trying to stay in touch with those who have played important roles in my life back home, whether they be friends, family, or professionals who have mentored me in some fashion. On this front, one of the hardest lessons I’ve learned is that not all relationships are reciprocal, some are merely a matter of convenience. To this effect, when they are no longer convenient for the other party, the communication essentially ceases to exist despite your best efforts to reach out and stay in touch. This has been one of the hardest realities I’ve had to come to terms with as I learn to keep moving on, although it’s very rarely so simple.

The hardest aspect of this has been seeing close friends from high school and college drift away while I was in France. Eventually, I was able to see the writing on the wall in the realization that very few people in my life are as painstakingly intentional as I am, whether it’s trying to meticulously make plans or stick to a schedule, or dedicating time to maintaining relationships with friends and family from afar. It is not my intention to seem pessimistic here, I’m simply calling the shots as I see ‘em. On the bright side, I’ve learned more about those in my friend and family circles who continue to stay in touch even when it’s inconvenient or the odds are not stacked in our favor.


One thing I am grateful for in this arena are my professional friends and acquaintances. Whether at the Mayor’s Office, or within the ranks of local party leadership, I’ve had friends and mentors, Republican and Democrats alike, make substantive efforts to not only keep lines of communication open but who have also sought to keep me apprised of things going on back home as we continue to bounce ideas off of one another, just as we have been accustomed to doing.


Along the same track, the physical separation and time gap have helped me to achieve an entirely new level of fierce independence as I knew nobody and had no one to rely on upon arriving in each of the countries I’ve visited. I’m a one man show when abroad, and while it is certainly freeing to never be bound or obliged by anyone else’s schedule or preferences, there are many times when the weight of literally having to do it all, all alone, can take both a physical and emotional toll. Recently, I’ve felt this reality hit me once again as I’ve had to move from a dormitory, to a temporary apartment, and will soon have to move to my permanent apartment here- all the while lugging suitcases between bus stops, or calling an uber if absolutely necessary 😊 (More humorous stories about this experience are to come with future posts)

So where was I going with all of this again? I’m almost there…


I began discussing my condition, as a relaxation-adverse motivated go getter. Mind you, although there are circumstances in which it’d probably be good for me to loosen up a little bit and not be such a staunch stick in the mud, I would never want to alter my work ethic or intrinsic self-motivation. I would however like to become better at enjoying life’s fleeting moments in the present, before they become memories of a distant past. How am I going to do this? I’m not entirely sure, I mean- with all of my traveling I already do this to an extent.


I need to become better at appreciating the small moments in which my mind is often too preoccupied to slow down and take note of. As much as I am motivated to plan for and pursue the future, I have come to the realization that I need to supplement that motivation with a little bit of inspiration- an inspiration that comes through the appreciation of the present in anticipation of the future.


I’m off of my soap box now, just a few thought I wanted to share; thank you for taking the time to read.


Note: Thought for a potential upcoming blog series of “Questions that motivate me” - Every day I’ve got a few questions constantly on my mind, questions and thoughts that help to motivate me. These are the personal, practical, and even theological or philosophical musings that help to center me in my pursuits, including those seemingly random 2:00am thoughts that I just feel like I have to jot down when they wake me up at night. – What do you think? Feel free to leave a comment or write a message.